So, um. Ahem.

For about a week, I’ve been dreading writing this post.  Because I really hate big throat-clearing announcements.  And I also hate goodbyes.

But it’s time to face reality.  Sigh.  In a couple of weeks, the hubs and I will say farewell to NYC and drag a U-Haul full of stuff down to Raleigh, NC.

Why the move?  The short answer is that the hubs’ job here in NYC was a one-year deal and it ends this month.  And he wants to pursue a very cool entrepreneurial opportunity that requires him to be down there, at least for a little while.

Unfortunately I can’t make a solid financial argument for us to stay in NYC based on my incredibly lucrative career as a lazy freelancer and part-time retail worker.  (Believe me, I tried.  There was lots of fuzzy math involved.  Hubs saw right through it, the smarty pants.)

Anyway.  As I’m sure you’ve gathered, I’m sort of having a hard time accepting all of this.  Okay, a really hard time.  Although I never envisioned New York as a permanent residence, I kind of had my heart set on staying a little longer.  We’ve barely been here a year.

I love it here.  I love my work, even though I earn a fraction of what I did in my consulting days.  I love my neighborhood.  I love my friends, both old and new.  I love running in Central Park and track workouts with my team and fro-yo from Bloomingdales.  I love not driving and having things delivered.

I am pretty darn happy here.  And change is hard when you’re happy.

I’m sure North Carolina is a wonderful place.  Really.  I know I’ll probably adjust just fine and be happy as a clam there, eventually.  But it doesn’t take the sting out of making a change that I don’t particularly want to make.  This is the fourth major move that the hubs and I have made in the last few years.  I feel like I just got settled here and now it’s time to uproot.  Again.

This NYC year has been so wonderful, and I’m glad that I’ve been able to share my adventures with you guys. I feel like being a New Yorker has been a part of my blogdentity (made up word alert) and truthfully it’s a little scary to lose that.  (Scary and sad.  The tears started flowing two paragraphs ago, and my beer is getting unfortunately salty.)

I hope that you’ll all come along with me for the next chapter. I promise lots of fun stories about BBQ and humidity and…other things that happen in the South, I guess.  It’s the one part of the country I’ve never lived, so this is all gonna be brand new to me!

Thanks for attending my pity party.  I’ll be back tomorrow with some more upbeat eating, drinking and/or running content for your reading pleasure!


57 responses to “So, um. Ahem.

  1. change is very hard when youre happy! but i bet you can find happy in NC. i’m slightly jealous though as i’m such a southern girl at heart despite being born and raised in new england

    good luck with the move. i’m totally sending positive vibes your way 🙂

    • Thank you 🙂 I’m sure I have a little southern girl in me too – after all, I love country music! I’m sure it will come out once I get over the shock and sadness of leaving NYC.

  2. 🙂 A smiley face b/c I’m proud of you for writing this post. It shows you clearly have the fortitude to thrive thru this uncomfortable period. Moving sucks. Moving when you don’t want to sucks more. But the bottom line is you’ve got Hubs … and then the rest of us. In that order. Family always comes first even though the rest of us are pretty cool … except Sarah who eats bugs. Both of you will get thru this and be better people for it. Trust me. NYC will always be here. You will come back … hopefully permanently, but definitely for visits.

    I won’t do the goodbye thing … I won’t see you as much as I would like, but we do have these Interwebs to keep us connected. Let’s use the shit out of them.

    • Bugs in the south are even bigger and badder and…more edible. You all should do a team trip southward. I recommend January, when you’re all freezing and I’m relaxing in ideal running/racing conditions. Maybe it can be a tune-up for Boston!

  3. Thank you Shelby, for sharing your NYC experience, in such an interesting way as only you could do. I have totally enjoyed my own experience of this part of “Your Personal Legend”!
    Love, Dad

    • I’m not sure how interesting my stories about Trader Joe’s and Thai food are, but thanks. 🙂 Looking forward to hosting a visit to NC – one benefit is that we might actually have a guest bedroom!

  4. I’m going to visit you, for real. Proud of you for finally making the post 🙂

  5. I’m sorry to hear this news! Moving, like any change, is always hard.

    One good thing about the blog world, though – we don’t really have to say goodbye!

  6. lifeisbeachykeen

    I have really enjoyed reading about your life in NYC, its so totally different from my life in FL… I am excited to read about your adventures in NC, it’s a beautiful state. The Hubs & I both have family there, and more family that is being stationed there come October. I have a lot of great childhood memories that were made in the mountains of North Carolina!

    Good luck with your move!

  7. Bummer! Even though I live here too, you always seem to give me good ideas about fun things to do … and good running workouts! I hope the move goes smoothly. In this city, it’s not always guaranteed!

    • Well, the workouts will hopefully continue. 🙂

      Amen on moving in NYC being a royal pain. Trying to figure out overnight parking for a 14′ truck in the West Village? Is not fun.

  8. I second Jacqui’s comment – we are coming to visit you for real! And you’ve always got a space on my futon 🙂

    Let’s make a tentative date for NYC marathon week froyo??

  9. Remember we are still in our nomad phases. It’s always hard to remember how many addresses I’ve had in the last 10 years, but this will be a good move. I know what it is like to move overseas (and then back again in less than a year) because the men we married are marketable all over the world and despite great strides in the feminist movement, we follow them along. I am a little sad that Chicago didn’t make the cut and now I have no reason at all to visit NY, but in 10 years we’ll probably miss these days where we got to experience so many different places.

    Most importantly though – what kind of car are you going to get?

    • A car? Huh? Oh….crap.

      Well….we still have our 4-Runner which has been living in IL. I’m sure we’ll bring that out to NC in short order. Not sure if we’ll need two. I kind of hope we can get away with one car, but that depends on our apartment situation (which is, like, totally not figured out yet. At all. Stress.)

  10. Well I am sad you are leaving NYC but be happy you are going on to a new adventure!!
    I am sure there are plenty of new opportunities awaiting you in Raleigh!! I am sure they are some awesome trails and you can also sign up for a local run to get you acquainted with the area!
    I think as a countdown, you need to do WTF New York moment every day until the last day you leave..actually it is a must.

  11. First – best of luck with the move!

    NYC amazes me like this. It’s such a transient place. I’ve been here 7+ years and have witnessed people come, go and some ultimately stay. I truly believe that those that love it do end up coming back;)

    Do you have your NYC bucket list (well at least for this time – it’s not a goodbye, just a see you soon list really!)?

  12. This is such a given, but I am pissed/bummed that you are taking off just when we were going to be able to hang out more. You’ve really embraced NYC, and it’s such a pleasure to read about. But…this is just another adventure, and I’m more than confident you’ll take on Raleigh with the same humor and drive. And I’m soooooo looking forward to WTF, NC? posts. Like, seriously.

    • Oh yeah. I’m coming for you, southerners!
      And yes…very bummed that I’m leaving just as you’ve started running more on this side of the tunnels. 😦 You’re always welcome to visit me in NC!

  13. I’m excited to read about your NC life! I think it’s you that makes your blog interesting not your location.

  14. It is always scary to move, I’m on my 7th city (ok, this is nowhere close to even counting as a city) in 10 years, I think you just have to embrace it. As you have often blogged about, each place that you have lived has been special to you for one reason or another, Raleigh will be also when you give it a chance!

    Since you are a bloggie-nerd and a great writer, you will not end up leaving anyone behind. They’ll still be right here.

  15. Ah! Welcome to NC – you will love it here. Not quite the same as NYC, but it’s a great place to live. We’ll welcome you with bbq, sun-drop, and lance crackers 🙂

  16. I’ve never been a fan of moving — but after I do I start to find wonderful things about my new residence.

    Just because you are moving to NC for now, it doesn’t mean you will never move back to NYC — who knows what will happen in the future!

    • Honestly, I have never lived in a place that I didn’t like, so I’m sure I will discover awesome stuff in Raleigh too. Sigh…I just wish it wasn’t happening so soon!

  17. Let me know when and where and I’ll help you move in your new place!!!! I’m only 3.5 hours away.

  18. I’ve gone through a couple major moves myself in my adult life and it’s always an adventure. Aside from the packing all your shit up and then unpacking it, losing it and then finding it in a box in the shed two years later, moving is kind of awesome. And you’ll probably be AMAZED at how inexpensive everything is on earth. 😉

    • The last time we moved, we found boxes that had moved with us twice and never been unpacked. Like, books from college. That I didn’t read the first time when it was assigned in class and certainly will never read again. Awesome.

      Cost of living is definitely a benefit to Raleigh, relative to New York anyway! No more $8 beers!

  19. Think of it this way….at least you aren’t moving to New Jersey!! 🙂 (sorry to offend any NJ folks…but I live in the state and wouldn’t wish it on anyone!!)

  20. Wow – it seems crazy that you’re going to move to the South; mainly because whenever I tune into your blog you just seem to be the quintessential New Yorker. You do cool things like run in Central Park, ride on the subway, and get take-out cuisine of every type imaginable. (In small town MN, I just can’t do those things ) But, every area totally does have it’s own charm and benefits. I’ve always wanted to spend some time in New York, and your blog is the closest I may get! However… I KNOW you will write awesome things from North Carolina, and you’ll make new friends and find new adventures. I hope the humidity isn’t too bad; I HATE running in humidity. The good thing is that as your virtual friends, most of you can come right along with you!! Hope planning the move goes well and doesn’t disrupt marathon training too much.

    • Humidity is awful. Honestly, that’s probably one of the things I’m most worried about – running in the summer down there. Humidity makes me cry. Ugh.

      NYC is fantastic. Definitely visit if you ever get the chance! It’s unlike any other place I’ve lived and I am going to miss it so much. 😦

  21. I’m sad that you are moving since I’ve just started to get to know you, but I’m sure you will quickly adapt to NC. It looks like they have quite a running club! ( that runs almost every day! (I checked out the calendar). And after this summer we’ve had, you’ll definitely be very, very well acclimated to the southern-er weather. I’m a little envious at all the trails you’ll have at your disposal to run on!!

    • I am really, really sad to leave my little CPTC family. 😦 It’s been great running with you guys and getting to know you – and you won’t be rid of me so quickly, I still plan on following workouts (at least through the fall racing season) and shall haunt you guys via Strands 🙂

  22. Best of luck with your move-I look forward to reading about your NC adventures as much as I enjoy reading about your NYC ones!! (I think they have Trader Joe’s down there? 😉 )

    And agree with what everyone else said…no matter how far geographically everyone is apart, we’re all still connected in blog land.

    See you on 10-10-10 in Chicago! 🙂

  23. Whyyy you must you leave so soon after our first date?! I really saw this relationship going somewhere! 😦 but seriously, I am sad you are leaving but as others said, blogland shall keep you connected to your NYC friends, just as it will connect you with NC peeps.

    Goodbye yoga/ drinks?!

  24. Awww! Big bummer – though I am kind of jealous. I love moving to new places but my husband would never leave his family. That’s endearing though, right? The south has always called to me though. Something about it is so romatic. I can’t wait to follow your adventures to NC!

  25. Love your blog. You will enjoy NC-my favorite state! Mountains and the Beach-you really can’t beat it. I lived in Boston and NY for many years before relocating South. While it is certainly an adjustment I think you will enjoy it. And Raleigh has a Trader Joes!
    Best of Luck!

  26. We will miss you and your BACs! When is the actual goodbye date so we can have another cat date before that?

  27. Booo. Though on the bright side, no snow, nice beaches…the Raleigh-Durham area is nice! I’d switch places with you if I could (since I hate it where I am) but…I think that’d be weird since I don’t know your husband. It might be awkward.


  28. I’m sorry you’re bummed out! I hope you find your way in NC and don’t get too blue. 😦

  29. I’ll be following you!!! I’ve enjoyed reading your blog posts.
    I think you will learn to love NC (the South rocks!) and it’s only temporary right? And don’t worry you have LocoPops and Magnolia Grill (in Durham) to keep you happy. Mmmm goat cheese cheesecake. 🙂 Farm to Table living is the best and I expect you to eat that way and blog about it while you’re in NC. 😀

  30. the key to running in Raleigh is salt pills and body glide! i just moved here less than 2 months ago, there are plenty of shaded trails to escape the hot sun, so it’s really not too bad. and the trader joes here is great!

  31. Shelby:
    I feel your pain….unwanted change IS difficult. But on the positive side you do have the hubs with you. And the kitties.
    Plus you may find your guest bedroom to be occupied a lot since NC is one of the states we still need to do a marathon in…along with SC, GA, AL, TN, KY and WV. How long y’all stayin’ there ??

  32. NC isn’t too bad (I’m in Charlotte) I’ve enjoyed Raleigh the times I’ve been there and I believe there is a WF there 🙂

  33. moving is tough, especially when you are happy where you are. but, as someone who has moved, err, 6 times in the past 6 years, happy starts with the people you are with. also, i went to the dentist today after two + years and teeth falling out dreams- you totally inspired me to take the leap!!

  34. How exciting & crazy! I can’t even imagine all the moving you’ve done in the last few years…. I can’t wait to read about your new adventures.

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