Frosting neutrality

A couple of mornings ago, I had just come in from a cold run and was putting around my mother-in-law’s house, eating a big slice of carrot cake.  (Gotta refuel, right?)

The hubs approached and requested a bite.  I acquiesced, and raised the slice toward his mouth.  What happened next was nothing short of shocking.  He went in for his bite, and centered his jaw right over the mound of puffy white cream-cheese frosting.

I gasped in horror.  Is he really going to eat the frosted top right off of my cake?   Really?? “Hey!” I snapped.  “You can’t do that!  That’s not frosting neutral!”

But it was too late.  He took the money bite, right out of my sweaty, napkin-covered hand.

As angry as I was, left standing there with a naked piece of carrot cake, I was more disappointed.  That I am married to a person who would do such a thing.  And it got me thinking about all of my other food-related pet peeves, so many of which crop up during the holidays.

For example, the hubs is also a trail mix picker.

You know: the person who hovers over the bowl, looking to spot the M&M’s or chocolate chips or whatever little treat is mixed in there, then digs through with his greedy little fingers and plucks out all of the tasty bits, leaving everyone else with a pile of peanuts and dates.  Don’t be this person.  Just take a blind handful and move on.

Or what about the person who “accidentally” takes all of the toppings from your piece of pizza?

Get a knife and cut it if you’ve got magnetic mozzarella on your hands.  Because no one likes a sad slice of sauce-on-crust.

Or, my personal favorite, the cheese digger.

People.  We all know that wedge of Brie or Camembert has a rind – a nasty rind that no one really wants to eat.  That doesn’t give you license to burrow your cheese knife into the soft, creamy center and scrape out all of the good stuff.  Slice it on to your own plate and then pick it apart!

Whew.  It feels good to get that off my chest.  And yes, I realize that I sound rather nutty and OCD.  I’m okay with that.  Now if only I could get the hubs to understand the importance of frosting neutrality.  I fear it’s something we’ll never be able to agree on.  In the meantime, though, I’m keeping him away from my cupcakes.

Today’s EAT: Speaking of frosting….

Cute, right?  I popped at least three coconut jellybeans in my mouth for every one that went on the roof.  (And for the record: tiling a gingerbread roof with bisected jellybeans is an extremely arduous and time-consuming task.)

Today’s DRINK: Nothing but water and lots of hot tea up in here.  I’m excited to be reunited with my wine rack tomorrow, though!

Today’s RUN: A COLD five miler.  13 degrees and close to zero with the wind chills…brrrr.  It was hard to get out the door, but after about ten minutes I was toasty warm!  I wore: tights, a long-sleeve tech shirt, a short-sleeve tech shirt, a light jacket, and a fleece hat.  (No gloves.  I rarely wear gloves.  Even when it’s super cold, I end up getting annoyed with them and ditching them after a couple of miles.  I think I have extra-sweaty hands!)

Today’s QUESTION: How do you eat cake – frosting first, frosting last, or frosting neutral?  And what are your food pet peeves?

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19 responses to “Frosting neutrality

  1. I am in the same camp as your husband, I’m such a frosting fiend that I can’t help but take the money bites first when I am sharing a dessert so that I know I will get more than my share of the frosting.

    Though if the slice is all mine, I try to take my time and savor the frosting.

    Clearly I’ve given this a great deal of thought.

  2. Definitely when someone leaves just a liiiittle btit of liquid left in a container, you know, so they don’t have to rinse the milk jug/clean out the sauce jar/buy the new lubric…oh, we’re talking strictly food?

  3. I usually scrape the icing off cake. It’s just to sweet. I can eat a little bit, but then it’s sugar overload and I can’t handle anymore. – I don’t really have any food pet peeves.

  4. frosting last. gotta save the best bite for the end right? but i’m not the biggest cake person in general (which is funny because i made one last week and over the holiday weekend!) so i rarely eat it but i always have eaten the cake part first. and separately too. i don’t want that cake-ness to taint the goodness that is the frosting. maybe i should just dig a spoon into a jar of icing instead. hmmmmm.

  5. HAAA.

    A coworker was telling me last week his kid got into some oreos and licked the cream filling out of every one in the bag. He’ll probably grow up to be a frosting-mound-biter. Which sounds delightful btw.

  6. “she ain’t nothing but a cheese digger”

    Literal laughs, I hate those diggers! I hate loud chewers!

  7. I am all about frosting neutrality. If it’s too sweet though, I’ll just scrape it off and eat the middle. 🙂

  8. It is NOT ok to eat only the frosting when you are stealing a bite of someone elses. But only because I actually share Drew’s regard that the cake portion is a mere conduit for the frosting ( if it is the good stuff, made with real butter and the like). Totally ok to eat only your frosting, and to leave the cake behind. Not ok to eat someone elses.

  9. This is the same as leaving ONE square of toilet paper on the roll. Oh, thank you, these two cubic inches of toilet paper are really going to help me out as I sit here, stranded on the can.

    I fully admit that frosting > cake in my book. However, I get around this by waiting around for the tiny corner piece of cake with the huge mondo glob of frosting on it. This, for some reason, grosses people out, but gives me the greatest satisfaction.

  10. I’m definitely guilty of being a cheese digger…

  11. Call me crazy, but I actually like the rind on most cheeses – it’s just a bit funkier. Food pet peeves generally are more etiquette based though. I *despise* when people chew with their mouths open, put their face close to their plate and practically shovel food in, or eat noisily (and I’m veerrry sensitive to the noisy eating). As for cake vs frosting? I eat the cake first with minimal frosting and then eat the remainder of the frosting on its own. Mmm, sugar.

  12. Did he not know he was in the wrong doing that?! Was he trying to get a rise out of you?

    Man, now I want carrot cake. Fortunately my husband detests all things cream cheese, so it’d be all mine. muhaha

  13. Oh cake – it is ALL, and ONLY, about the frosting. Beware any family member (or anyone else, for that matter) trying to get any of mine! Since I usually have a fork in my hand when I’m eating cake, said fork is a useful weapon for saving MY frosting!

  14. Hahahaha, perfect illustrations!

    We would make a good cake team; often I get sick of frosting really quickly so I’ll lop it right off of the cake and throw it out. Just not my thing, I guess.

    Definitely a candy + dried fruit trail mix picker AND a pizza topping stealer though.

    Be glad your gingerbread house wasn’t from Whole Foods!!
    http://blogs.ocweekly.com/stickaforkinit/2010/12/whole_foods_recalls_ginger_bre.php

  15. I am totally a trail mix picker. I’m also a popcorn picker–the bf hates it–I search for the popcorn that has the best butter. 😀 I have no shame either! I will continue to do it!

  16. Frosting neutral. I’m not a huge frosting fan.

    LOL Hubby does that with brie, but at least he cuts a wedge off, puts it on his plate and then starts digging it out. 🙂

    My food pet peeve are picky eaters! Ugh. Give food a chance!

  17. I try to evenly distribute my frosting amongst the cake (frosting neutral?). Carrot cake is useless without frosting! I would be so mad!

  18. hah, this post cracks me up. i am totally food-greedy and hate sharing bites of anything. BT knows this and likes to ask, all the time as i’m taking the last bite, “mind if i take the last bite?” i give him “the look” and we laugh it off, but if he were serious… wooo boy, there’d be major problems in our relationship!

  19. I’m soooo late to the game on this one, but I had to chime in. We brought 4 lbs of M&M laced trail mix to Africa with us. One day, about halfway through the trip, Chris dumped out the whole darn bag, picked out every single M&M, and then returned all of the reject trail mix to the big bag. WTF? It still gets me riled up just thinking about it. Grrr.

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