I realize there are still 25 days left in the year. Plenty of time for hopeful, perverted and/or just plain bizarre people to find their way to this site. But let’s celebrate early, shall we?
My ten favorite search terms of 2010:
10. Spinning for squid (3 hits) – Ew. I don’t like spin class or calamari enough to condone this.
9. Big ass girl (19) – plus about ten times that many if you rearrange this combination of words. Guys: I hate to disappoint you, but all you’re gonna find here is a white girl who likes big ass salads. Sorry.
8. Failed fudge cookies (7) – Thanks. Rub it in.
7. Lululemon key cuff (186) – I reviewed this product ages ago. Apparently that page is somehow a top search result for this product. Kinda funny, because this $10 piece of lycra is just about the only thing I can actually afford from there. (Hey lulu, how about a little kickback, eh?)
6. Rachael Ray running (124) – Does she even run?
5. Dirty cookie monster (3) – Yes, I always thought so, too.
4. Beautiful midriff (4) – Aw, thanks, you four people. Pale and flabby is in this season!
3. Slimey (sic) off garbage hair (3) – Hey now! Just because I don’t wash it every day….
2. Dirty drunk runner (9) – It’s happened before. I won’t lie.
1. Snugglefest 2010 (70) – I’m baffled that this one pops up a couple of times a week. Was this, like, an actual event? Where do I sign up for 2011?
Those are just the PG ones – because there are some pervy people out there, I tell ya! May 2011 bring even more Google oddities my way!
Today’s EAT: I picked up a package of a new-to-me food this weekend – tempeh. (No, I’m not going vegetarian. I’m just cheap. And tired of chicken breasts.)
Not entirely sure what to do with it, I decided to make some balls.
And a tasty vodka sauce. Because it seemed unlikely that I would screw the stuff up so badly that loads of garlic and parm couldn’t save it.
This was quite good, actually! The hubs sniffed at it and wrinkled his nose, but I thought the nutty tempeh actually worked really well with the flavorful vodka sauce. Not a substitute for good old fashioned meatballs, exactly, but a fun change of pace.
Recipe: Tempeh Alla Vodka
Today’s DRINK: When I saw this Hot Apple Cider Tea, I had high hopes.
On its own, it’s a little bland, but with a splash of honey it’s delicious. (And a splash of whiskey….if I had some. I do love a good hot toddie on a cold night!)
Today’s RUN: Crisp, cold and pretty darn quick, for me anyway! I met up with the Nog Club and trotted a brisk 6 miles in 46:15. Skipped the post-run beers in favor of a hot shower.
Today’s QUESTION: If you’re a blogger, what’s your favorite recent search term? And also, for anyone…what else does one do with tempeh? I can see picking it up somewhat regularly – I need ideas!
eat, drink, run 
Um, I had pan burns? I use pans for baking, but I honestly don’t remember burning anything…huh..
I do stir fries with tempeh. I just crumble it in with the rest of the veggies I’m doing.
Mine are a little less exciting, but my main ones include various iterations of “booty shorts” (high school booty shorts, Sarah Palin in booty shorts, and my favorite, “crazy booty”), “team in training sucks/is annoying,” and, my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE, searches for “the ghost on the subway in ghost.”
Tempeh. I love it. You can slice it thin and marinate/grill it to put in sandwiches. Stir fries with glass noodles and cabbage are fun. I recently braised it and tossed it in a bean chili.
You get booty and I get ass. There are a lotta butt men out there. 🙂
I love those glass noodles – that sounds great!
I’ve had some good ones this week:
“der fruhe vogel kann mich mal,” which is german for “the early bird can fuck off.”
“building a panic room inside my garage”
“scrambled eggs between the legs”
And, at least a few times I week I get variations of “dead baby from trainspotting.”
The early bird can indeed fuck off! Especially if he tries to serve scrambled eggs between the legs! Hahaha – good ones!
too funny. Google Analytics is like a window into peoples minds.
“…tempeh. (No, I’m not going vegetarian. I’m just cheap. And tired of chicken breasts.)”
Amen to that. Same reason there’s been a tofu revolution on our house too. Plus, I don’t have to scrub down the cutting board, sink, and countertops after I prepare it, lest we die of salmonella.
How do you think tempeh compares to tofu? I haven’t tried it yet.
It is much drier and nuttier! Like tofu though, it seems to soak up the flavor of whatever it around it. And isn’t as tricky to cook…you don’t have to worry about squeezing every last drop of water out of it, and can cook it in a wet sauce without worrying about the soggy factor. That’s my newb opinion, anyway 🙂
Now this is some funny shit! Thanks.
Search terms are always good for their entertainment value 😀
Some of the recent (PG) favorites I’ve gotten…
“cows tails and weather myths”
“why don’t baby calfs have spots”
“dairy cow pictures in hawaii”
“cow husband”
HAHA – Cow Husband. Do you call him that now? I totally would!
heheh. i love rando search terms. mine usually do with drunkeness. oops?
I’ve gotten some pretty crazy ones… but my most recent one to leave me confused is “coffee hump”. What the hell is a coffee hump? And do I have one? How do I get rid of it?!?! Aaahhhh!
Well, this is awkward. I wasn’t gonna say anything about it, but…
😛
I love the Google Searches. They pretty much rule. Some awesome ones:
“eaten by cats”
“human cats”
“taco bell made me dizzy”
“pear zombie”
Haha snugglefest 2010, love it. Obviously I get a lot of things having to do with vomit and puke, and people vomiting on each other. cute.
I think people expect to see some sort of nudity on my blog. 🙂
“naked girl on santa’s lap” “see through singlet” “naked male swimmers”
Maybe because you are a “fly girl” like those dancers that used to be on In Living Color? Haha.
Hilarious! I love the Dirty drunk runner one. Not going to lie…I’ve been there a time or 2 🙂
I am going home to look at my search terms now…I don’t pay close enough attention, but some are RANDOM!
Thanks for the for real life LOLz. Dirty Drunk Runner is my favorite! Touche.
Also I lurrve this recipe for tempeh.
http://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/tempeh-curry-recipe.html
I have tried to combine it with sweet potato in a burrito a few times and it was meh.
Ooh, I could see how curry + tempeh would be a great combo. It’s porous enough to soak up the flavor, but sturdy enough to not get soggy. Thanks!
Hahah I just LOL’ed at all of your search terms! I don’t have any fun ones, although a page that frequently gets visited on my blog is of a review of the H&M mobile app, something I wrote ages ago. Must be something with the reviews!
I also agree-Lululemon is expensive although the store is simply gorgeous!
LOL those are awesome!
Some search terms I’ve had:
“long fingers”- Well yes I do have them, but WTF?!
smoke jowls-YUM!
pumping unit rudolph christmas ornament- no clue
those are awesome search terms. sometimes i wonder what exactly are people thinking? sheesh.
This is hysterical! The lady in the cube next to me has to wonder WTF is going on over here.
What to do with tempeh? Lettuce wraps of course!
My favorite recent search term? “Goat cheese and hoisin sauce” Why on Earth would anyone put those together?
YAY! Tempeh! I just learned (after nearly 4 years of vegan and 10 of vegetarian) to steam the tempeh before cooking it, it takes some of the bitterness out.
I love those search terms! My favorite is “phone sex porn.” I’m actually quite proud of it.